The Advocate

(Zdzislaw Beksinski, 1973, Untitled) There were so many times in my life that I should've died. So many times when I should've been lost. So many times when I shouldn't have made it. Maybe it's the fact that I'm nearly 40 when I never thought I would've lived to see 30. Maybe it's just the precarious state of the world and I'm feeling like I've never stopped fighting against all the terrible things destroying it. Maybe it's nothing but cobwebs in my ear and something even more ephemeral in my chest. But here I am at my desk typing away past 2 AM. Memories coursing through me like haunting ghosts and flashbacks faster than bolts of lightning surging across tormented skies. *** I was 1 year old in 1987, laying at the foot of the stairs I'd been knocked down, arm and leg broken, crying for help, but none came until my parents found me hours later almost unconscious while the babysitter was watching Saved By The Bell. I was 2 years old and my mot...

Before October 7, 2023, I was a proud progressive Jew here in San Leandro. Before October 7, I was a friend of our local Social Justice Academy and our resident Democratic Socialists of America chapter. Before October 7, I never would have believed that Jews were endangered by leftist antisemitism . After October 7, I learned how very wrong I was. In the wake of the Hamas massacre, fallen friends and alleged allies turned their backs. People I've stood with for police reform, housing, healthcare, and social justice here in San Leandro now embrace antisemitism, tokenization, and conspiracy theories, promoting the very same bigotry they claim to oppose. Just as we have seen in Oakland, Richmond, Berkeley, and San Francisco , the cause of Palestinian liberation has been hijacked for divisive attacks on Jewish people rather than advocating for peace and the sanctity of human life. I write publicly now because as Rabbi Abraham Kook taught, "I don't speak because I have the pow...

( From JTA ) I cannot help but notice a lot of disinformation, ignorance, and bigotry coming from people who call themselves pro-Palestinian and/or pro-Israel as this conflict continues to spiral into ever more suffering. Sometimes, I feel like the best thing I can do when struggling amidst human tragedy is to focus on education as a path for compassion, understanding, and solidarity. Since I am Jewish, I will tell a story of my people. So, I am here to share a little bit about the history of Zionism , which at its core is the belief in the Jewish people's right to self-determination in their ancestral homeland. While Zionism has this central core meaning, there are several expressions (or "flavors") of it in practice: political, revisionist, labor, cultural, religious, practical, reform, & radical. There's actually even green Zionism! But all forms tie back, in some form or another to Israel - actually Yisrael, whether Am (the people), Eretz (the land), Medina...

( Hebrew Tattoos ) I have wanted to get a tattoo for years, but because of a deep-seated fear of needles, I have continued to put it off. This year, I will be turning 36 and I have decided for my double-chai birthday that I want to finally take this step in my journey. Being Jewish is such a central part of my identity, my life, my beliefs, and my path. There are so many different Jewish things I could think of that would make for amazing, beautiful tattoos. However, there is one concept that I believe contains all of them and more, that precedes and exceeds them. That is the concept of Eyn Sof . Without end . God, the universe, Jews, whatever your higher power or plane or presence you are connected to... all of it is without end. All of it is beyond the ability of humanity to describe in words, to capture in paint or pictures, to hear in songs or silence, to touch in stone or sand, to smell in smoke or steam, to hold in our hands or our minds. It is everything. It is nothing. It is be...

The Moorish Zionist Temple, Harlem, NY, 1929 (James Van Der Zee/The Folklore Research Center, Hebrew University of Jerusalem via the National Library of Israel Digital Collection) * This is a subject I've been wanting to write about for quite some time and, in honor of Black History Month this year, I'm finally taking the time to do so. It's about the first Black Jew in America and, more than that, the stories of the incredible lives of those who claimed the title. Now, before we get started, it's important to recognize that my research and learning on this subject is almost entirely indebted to the work of Jewish scholars, most of them Black Jews themselves, who came before me. I am  particularly indebted to scholar and rabbi ,[1] Shais Rishon, known by his pseudonym of MaNishtana. Toda raba, mishpocha. *** This story starts in the town of Wenham, Essex County, Massachusetts, circa 1668 .[2] On June 30 of that year, two people were presented to the local grand jury for...

(Broken Fingaz, a Jewish mural with Yiddish lettering, Warsaw, Poland, circa 2014) This is my last post in this series, and there's a good reason for that. In Judaism, letters also have a numerical value. Aleph is 1, Bet is 2, etc. The letter Chet is 8 and the letter Yud is 10, giving us the number 18 and the word "chai" for life. 18 plus 18 is 36, which is known as a "double chai." It's an auspicious and lucky number, the perfect way to complete this. Over the course of my various posts, I've highlighted the following: Middot: Hebrew for values, personal characteristics, traits, or virtues, but literally means measure or norms. Tikkun middot is personal self-growth through this process of cultivating moral traits. See the 48 list . Mitzvah: a commandment, one of 613 mitzvot, but also generally means a good deed with a focus on actions over thoughts or intentions. Hashkafa: the Hebrew term for worldview and guiding philosophy, your ideology. It's a p...

(Art by Karl Bodek and Kurt Conrad Löw, One Spring, 1941) Davka : There is no exact translation, but it can mean all of these things — of course, fuck, well shit, specifically, precisely, because, unexpectedly, just to spite, despite everything, whaddayaknow, of course, just my luck, Murphy’s law, even, damn, despite expectations to the contrary, a slightly amused or ironic feeling of "wouldn't you know it?", "of all things," "of all people,” definitely, exactly as stated, just to annoy, just to be contrary, just to piss me off, on purpose, to antagonize, willfully, spitefully, a paradox, actually, necessarily, like, “in your face,” an attitude of apathetic indifference, uncaring of consequences. It’s an ubiquitous word, a linguistic gestalt of overlapping meanings meandering across denotations and connotations like a tardigrade rolly polly honey badger badass. When all other words have failed, davka will do just fine. Take note and take care.

"Blewish, an animated short film based on true events about a Black and Jewish boy named Ezra, is premiering at the Chicago International Children's Film Festival! Writer and director Ezra Edmond hopes that Blewish will be watched alongside children who can see themselves represented in the character's journey to find belonging. Once you purchase a screening ticket, you will have from November 5 to November 14 to watch." As a parent in an interracial interfaith family with two Blewish daughters, this is the kind of content I love to see and want to see more of. As we know, representation matters and it's especially crucial to highlight the voices of those from historically marginalized communities - including those already within historically marginalized communities! Particularly when we explore them from the perspective of children. Those are the stories that captivate, that capture our imaginations while introducing us to a wider world we may never have known ...

( Art by Bluelela ) Gimel Zayin Yud : GZY is an acronym for gam zeh ya'avor, which means "this too shall pass / and this, too, shall pass away." There are many stories of its origin, but this is my favorite:  "One day Solomon decided to humble Benaiah Ben Yehoyada, his most trusted minister. He said to him, “Benaiah, there is a certain ring that I want you to bring to me.” “If it exists anywhere on earth, your majesty,” replied Benaiah, “I will find it and bring it to you, but what makes the ring so special?” “It has magic powers,” answered the king. “If a happy man looks at it, he becomes sad, and if a sad man looks at it, he becomes happy.” Solomon knew that no such ring existed in the world, but he wished to give his minister a little taste of humility. Spring passed and then summer, and still Benaiah had no idea where he could find the ring. He was about to give up when he decided to take a walk in one of the poorest quarters of Jerusalem. He passed by a merchant...

(Art by Robert Deninno) Kavod Habriyot : human honor and dignity. A concept for how we interpret and apply Jewish laws and rules where we uplift the inherent value and worth of a person over anything else. It is another principle that allows a Jew to violate religious requirements in pursuit of a higher good that is similar to pikuach nefesh (saving a life). For instance, when Rav Nahman bar Yitzhak is challenged by Rabbi Yohanan, the brother of his good friend Mar. The story goes that a corpse was found in the city of Derokera, and Rav Nahman bar Yitzhak permitted carrying it to a karmelit (a semi-public domain into which carrying on Shabbat only involves a minor transgression). Notably, "Rav Nahman bar Yitzhak was a renowned scholar who later became head of the Babylonian Academy in Pumbeditha. But as we are taught elsewhere, his primary scholarly achievements involved not innovating new legal positions, but accurately preserving and sharing the Torah teachings that he had recei...

Devekut : literally means dedication but traditionally refers to cleaving to God. In ancient Hebrew, to cleave is to become close, to join with, to adhere, to abide fast together, to follow. In religious Judaism and in academia, it's most commonly associated with the philosophical and mystical understanding of cleaving or attaching oneself to God in all areas of life. It can also refer to a deep, trance-like meditative state attained during prayer, Torah study, or when performing the 613 mitzvot. While it's particularly associated with the Jewish mystical tradition, in modern Israeli Hebrew, it's also often a synonym for dedication towards a particular goal. Devekut is that moment of silence when your mind is completely open, listening to your spirit harmonize with the world around you. It can appear as a sudden flash or a quiet realization, and all your misconceptions fall away until the only thing that remains is a feeling of pure connection with whatever you choose to fo...

(Siege and Destruction of Jerusalem by the Romans, 1850 painting by David Roberts) Yavne: a city in the central district of Israel. “For roughly a thousand years, Jewish worship meant bringing sacrifices to the Temple in Jerusalem. Then, in 70 CE, with the Temple about to fall, Rabbi Yochanan ben Zakkai imagined an alternative. He famously asked the Roman Emperor to 'Give me Yavne and its Sages.' From the academies of Yavne came a new form of worship, based on prayer and study. Animal sacrifice, it turned out, was not essential to being a Jew.” But in a larger sense, Yavne means acknowledging “a phase of Jewish history had run its course.” It means that Jews are a living people and part of that process is listening, learning, growing, changing, even or especially when we face our most painful challenges and our most bitter losses. It doesn’t mean abandoning our traditions or community. It doesn’t mean abandoning who we are as a people. Rather, it means embracing what we as a pe...

Parnassah: which means livelihood. It's your income and your ability to support yourself. Traditionally, it has meant your "living" in the sense of "making a living." However, as with all Jewish things, there's a deeper meaning. Parnassah is about more than securing the money to survive in society. It's about understanding the worth of our labor, the costs of our trade, and to chose our occupation with care, because "life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you get good at." Learn more here . Take note and take care.